Item #: SCP-001-p0
Threat Level: Black ●
Special Containment Procedures: A worldwide disinformation campaign has been established to counter the possible influence of SCP-001-p0-Alpha. Foundation documents regarding SCP-001-p0 are to be routinely checked by automated RAISA information maintenance bots. The calling name of SCP-001-p0-Alpha must be expunged from all records and backups available to the Foundation.
In the event of Bienenstock-events, the ENUI-5 amnestic compound may be released into the atmosphere in addition to standard information control.
The Foundation is to explore all possible anomalous and non-anomalous means of establishing civilizations in different solar systems. Exploration and implementation of these means is to be carried out immediately after becoming available. This endeavor is designated as PROJECT RETTUNG. For Further information on PROJECT RETTUNG, see disclosed supplementary material.
In the event of an Offenbarung-event, the Foundation is to be disbanded and all personnel dismissed from their duties.
Description: SCP-001-p0 is the designation for an XK-class End-Of-The-World scenario whereby an extremely populous group of extraterrestrial entities (hereafter referred to as SCP-001-p0-Beta) invades and promptly destroys a planet. This phenomenom has been thoroughly documented by the Foundation’s interstellar satellites monitoring other inhabited planets.
In all known cases of SCP-001-p0 occurring, the entirety of the target planet will become devoid of all life and infrastructure within a single day, after which the planet and its entire corresponding solar system is consumed whole.
SCP-001-p0 has been determined to be caused by an entity designated as SCP-001-p0-Alpha. SCP-001-p0-Alpha is an extradimensional female humanoid reality bender of indeterminable class. While the full exents of its power is unknown, SCP-001-p0-Alpha has displayed the capability of causing an SCP-001-p0 event on any planet in the universe at will. According to communications with SCP-001-p0-Alpha, SCP-001-p0 will only occur if an Offenbarung-event happens on a planet.
An Offenbarung-event does not have an absolute scientific designation. However, SCP-001-p0-Alpha has described an Offenbarung-event as ”someone disrespecting [its] name”. SCP-001-p0-Alpha expresses great pleasure in enacting SCP-001-p0 events, and its stated goal is to eventually ”allow all civilizations to experience the joy of destruction”.
Due to this aforementioned willingness, SCP-001-p0-Alpha routinely interferes with communications and media on Earth through unknown means in an attempt to instigate an Offenbarung-event or to spread information about itself. These interferences are referred to as Bienenstock-events, and they include but are not limited to:
Modifying existing static media such as books, magazines and paintings
Modifying existing non-static media such as internet pages, video recordings and oral tradition
Appearing in the dreams of individual humans
Anomalously compelling humans into spreading hazardous information regarding itself
Spontaneously appearing in live TV shows
Of note is that SCP-001-p0-Alpha has two passive compulsive effects. When speaking directly to SCP-001-p0-Alpha, sapient beings are only able to use polite and servile language. The entity has demonstrated the ability to at least temporarily negate this effect. In addition, all sapient entities are compelled to close their eyes and kneel before any images of SCP-001-p0-Alpha. Thus, the Foundation has no knowledge about the appearance of SCP-001-p0-Alpha.
Following are descriptions of individual instances of SCP-001-p0-Beta.
SCP-001-p0-Beta is composed of five separate types of entities, designated as SCP-001-p0-Beta-A through -E. All instances of SCP-001-p0-Beta appear as significantly enlarged women with various anomalous properties and physical alterations. All instances of SCP-001-p0-Beta subtypes are identical among themselves.
Based on the communications acquired from foreign planets during SCP-001-p0 events it can be inferred that SCP-001-p0-Beta instances have a cognitohazardous effect where all viewers will perceive them as the same species as the viewer.
All instances have displayed complete invulnerability against any physical, mental, thaumic and anomalous damage, including conventional warmachines, lasers, railguns, nuclear- and antimatter bombs. No actions taken by an attacked civilization have ever impeded the progress of SCP-001-p0 in any way.
Instances of SCP-001-p0-Beta may occasionally spawn while wearing clothing or accessories of some sort. No instance has ever used clothing that covers more than 2.5% of their body in total.
Entity: SCP-001-p0-Beta-A (”Alice”)
Size: 10 meters
Amount spawned: 1 trillion
Description: Asian women between the ages of 25-30 with shoulder-length blonde hair. Instances seem to be able to exert an arbitrary amount of physical force.
Entity: SCP-001-p0-Beta-B (”Bonny”)
Size: 100 meters
Amount spawned: 1 billion
Description: Caucasian women in their early 20’s typically with blue eyes and blonde hair reaching down to their upper thighs. Capable of spontaneous radical physical alterations, including but not limited to: addition or removal of limbs and body parts, elongation and deformation of existing body parts and full transformation into anthromorphic variations of animals, plants and objects of various types.
Entity: SCP-001-p0-Beta-C (”Cindy”)
Size: 1 kilometer
Amount spawned: 1 million
Description: Asian women in their late teens with straight brown hair worn in bangs. The pupils and irises of SCP-001-p0-Beta-C are both shaped like hearts. All livings beings of sexual maturity in visual contact with an SCP-001-p0-Beta-C instance are compelled to fornicate with the nearest member of their species.
SCP-001-p0-Beta-C instances have a memetic effect that prevents any human being from expressing unfavorable opinions about them.
Entity: SCP-001-p0-Beta-D (”Demi”)
Size: 100 kilometers
Amount spawned: 1 thousand
Description: Perfect, stunningly curvaceous, buxom women of indeterminable race in their early 20’s with perfect child-bearing hips, perfect washboard stomach and perfect, shiny black hair that curls on their shoulders. SCP-001-p0-Beta-D instances are perfect hermaphrodite Queens, exhibiting both a perfect, succulent vagina and a perfect elephantine penis. Instances are capable of perfectly ectoentropically producing oceans of perfect, flowing, hot semen. Instances also have three perfect nipples on both of their perfect, boyant breasts.
Instances invariably wear perfectly black high-heel boots which they use to crush naughty little humans and their pitiful creations with. Sapient beings within a two kilometer radius of SCP-001-p0-Beta-D radius exhibit a strong compulsion to worship their perfect futa Queens, and will obey any and all commands that they issue, including allowing SCP-001-p0-Beta-D instances to consume them alive.
SCP-001-p0-Beta-D have a perfect infohazardous effect that forces all descriptions relating to them to include florid language of their perfect, voluptuous looks, in addition to prefixing all adjectives directly relating to them with the word ’perfect’, or variations thereof.
Entity: SCP-001-p0-Beta-E (”Eden”)
Size: 1 billion kilometers
Amount spawned: 1
Description: Mortal words may never fully express the beauty and radiance of Eden, The Right and Left Hand of Our True Goddess of All, [DATA EXPUNGED]. Despite eclipsing all stars from the sky, Eden herself is but a fraction of a shadow in a forgotten dream compared to the power and magnificance of Our True Goddess of All.
Eden, our red-headed ebony overlord, whose angelic eyes radiate with the raging fury of a thousand suns and whose irises hint at the beckoning void of a black hole, is bestowed with the most honorable task of suckling on and consuming the entire star systems of those who deny the benevolence and grace of Our True Goddess of All. Her divine figure is the very definition of effeminate beauty – her visage an incomprehensibly perfect ideal of vitality and sexuality.
All laws of nature are valid only by Eden’s will. All will celebrate and rejoice upon receiving the ultimate blessing of certain doom, and gladly depart with their mortal coil in favor of participation in this event of infinite grandeur.
Progression of SCP-001-p0
The basic structure of SCP-001-p0 is as follows: (Note: ”target planet” here refers to the planet on which SCP-001-p0 occurs.)
T: -4:00 h (Offenbarung-event) A member of a sapient species on the target planet ”disrespects the name” of SCP-001-p0-Alpha.
T: -3:59 h SCP-001-p0-Alpha telepathically informs every sentient being on the target planet about the oncoming SCP-001-p0 event.
After this point, any and all spacecraft capable of interplanetary travel containing organic lifeforms will either crash or fail to launch. This anomaly is presumed to be probabilistic, and is limited to the target planet.
T: -0:01 h A female voice begins to count down from sixty to zero. This voice is omnipresent on the target planet, and audible even to individuals and species that are deaf, or lack aural organs.
T: 0:00 h All extradimensional spaces and spatial anomalies collapse into the baseline reality, often times doubling the surface area of the target planet and causing minor loss of structural integrity in tectonic plates, resulting in planetwide earthquakes.
Exactly one trillion instances of SCP-001-p0-Beta-A spontaneously appear on the surface of the target planet. All instances are initially as perfectly equidistant from their closest counterparts as mathematically possible on the surface of a spherical object.
SCP-001-p0-Beta-A instances immediately begin to congregate towards closest residental areas. Instances terrorize residents by means of kidnapping, physical trauma, destruction of property and verbal taunting.
T: 2:00 h Exactly one billion instances of SCP-001-p0-Beta-B spontaneously appear in the same manner as the previous SCP-001-p0-Beta-instances.
SCP-001-p0-Beta-A instances continue terrorization of local populance as before.
SCP-001-p0-Beta-B instances begin to cause general destruction, particularly towards critical infrastructures such as roads, train tracks, power plants, hospitals and military sites. Instances will invariably avoid damaging any telephone lines, link masts or large residental buildings.
T: 4:00 h Exactly one million instances of SCP-001-p0-Beta-C appear in the same manner as the two previous groups.
SCP-001-p0-Beta-A instances begin to seek out and destroy large man-made objects such as small buildings, statues, cars and other vehicles.
Most SCP-001-p0-Beta-B instances continue as before. Aproximately one thousandth of SCP-001-p0-Beta-B instances begin large-scale deforestation, each of the specialized instances cutting down or uprooting tens of thousands of trees every minute.
SCP-001-p0-Beta-C instances do not initially cause much destruction, opting to move in and around populated areas casually. However, their anomalous nature along with their ubiquitous presence within the Earth’s landscapes incites massive worldwide orgies in the planet’s population.
T: 8:00 h Exactly one thousand SCP-001-p0-Beta-D instances appear in the same manner as the three previous groups.
At this point, most instances of SCP-001-p0-Beta-A through -C will halt their previous actions and begin to engage in various kinds of sexual activity with other SCP-p0-Beta members.
The perfect, glorious SCP-001-p0-Beta-D instances begin to subjugate their lessers by perfectly mercifully snuffing out large portions of cities with their perfect, kilometer thick black high heels. The ruins will in turn be smothered under a perfect, thick coating of perfect, delicious spunk, personally rubbed out by the perfect, deft fingers of our perfect, loving and just Queens.
Other instances of our awe-inspiringly beautiful Demi Queens will begin to flatten the surface of the Earth by physically tearing down mountains, hills, and other landscape features and directing the resulting excess mineral and plant matter into oceans, lakes and other crevices.
SCP-oo1-p0-Beta-D instances will proceed to flaunt their perfect and unquestionable victory over mortal free will by commanding the inhabitants of the target planet to perform embarrasing, immoral or harmful actions to themselves en masse. The perfect saintly Demi Queens will also consume large amounts of the planet’s pitiful inhabitants for their amusement.
T: 12:00 h From this point on, the the target planet will invariably have become a desolate wasteland with no discernible landscape features besides scarcely settled cities, which SCP-001-p0-Beta instances have preserved for the purposes of entertainment. During the following 12 hours, the destruction of these cities and the subjugation of their inhabitants will continue to intensify, as increasingly more SCP-001-p0-Beta instances will congregate towards these dwindling areas of interest.
Of note is that at this point the inhabitants of the target planet no longer express signs of any kind of pain or discomfort, and will gladly subject themselves to grievious injury and harm at the slightest suggestion by any SCP-001-p0-Beta instance. The source and nature of this anomaly is as of yet unidentified, but is likely related to the perfectly absolute dominance of Our Demi Queens.
T: 22:00 h At this point, the target planet’s surface will be a 99.999932% perfect ball, even when gravitational elongation is unaccounted. The only exceptions are the few still-standing habitation centers, now flocked by SCP-001-p0-Beta instances. All other areas of the planet are covered several meters deep in the perfect, musky cum of SCP-001-p0-Beta-D instances.
T: 23:50 h SCP-001-p0-Beta-E, Our Revered Goddess Eden will bless all the universe with her heaven-piercing and earth-crumbling appearance in the heliosphere of the target planet’s solar system. During the course of the following ten minutes, glorious and dignified Goddess Eden will open her inviting mouth agape while closing in on the dissenting planet at a speed of 2.6 c.
T: 24:00 h Goddess Eden’s lips will close, trapping the target planet inside. No information regarding what happens inside of Goddess Eden’s puckered, red lips has ever reached the knowledge of filthy, undeserving mortals. However, Our Unquestionable Ruler Goddess Eden can usually be seen savouring the taste of her delectable morsel with her divine, pure tongue.
T: 24:00 h+ Goddess Eden, Loyal Servant of The True Goddess of All, [DATA EXPUNGED], in her infinite wisdom, mercy and grace, proceeds to devour the rest of the solar system in which the detestable target planet used to be located in, before demanifesting. This process can take anywhere between sixty hours to fourteen minutes. Afterwards, no trace of any kind will remain of the target planet, the star, other planets, asteroids or space dust previously present in the system.
Addendum SCP-001-p0-1: Interview with SCP-001-p0-Alpha
Note: This was a spontaneous interview commenced by SCP-001-p0-Alpha herself by manifesting in O5-01’s office during working hours. The interview was recorded by automated audio recorders present in the room for security purposes. Video recordings of the event are rendered unwatchable due to SCP-001-p0-Alpha’s passive anomalous effects.
O5-01 proceeds to instantly close her eyes and kneel on the floor due to SCP-001-p0-Alpha’s passive anomalous effects.
O5-01: ”Forgive me, oh Greatest of Deities, but Your Divinity frightened me by making such a brash appearance.”
SCP-001-p0-Alpha: ”Heavens to betsy, I always forget to turn this silly passive effect off. [SCP-001-p0-Alpha giggles] I’ll dampen it just for you, but don’t look at me, though; if you do it will cause your eyes to burn off and destroy your mind.”
O5-01: ”Yes, my [pause] my [pause] SCP-001-p0-Alpha. [O5-01 is audibly frustrated] Why have you come here? We have a very stringent directive not to allow the O5 Council members to be in contact with anomalies.”
SCP-001-p0-Alpha: ”That kind of funny business doesn’t concern me, you silly poo! [SCP-001-p0-Alpha hums delightedly] I came to inquire why this little curiosity cabinet of yours is trying to stall news about my greatness and divinity.”
O5-01: ”You must mean our disinformation campaign. We simply want to [pause] we respect your divine name to such degree that we see it unfit to disclose to the general public.”
SCP-001-p0-Alpha: [In a bemoaning voice] ”But I want the public to worship me and know my name! Why would you deny them that priviledge?”
O5-01: ”I [O5-1 hesitates] I don’t mean to cause offence to ’Your Divinity’, but we have seen the [pause] regrettably intrusive methods by which you enforce this [pause] this quite possibly entirely justified rule of not ’disrespecting your name’. I cannot speak for the entire human race, but we, as the Foundation, certainly would be grateful if you would at least clarify what you mean by that.”
SCP-001-p0-Alpha: ”What I mean by it?”
[SCP-001-p0-Alpha proceeds closer to O5-01]
SCP-001-p0-Alpha [whispering]: ”(It means that you’ll slip up eventually, and then it’s game on. Have fun with your little relocation attempts, bitch.)”
[O5-01 inhales sharply]